Giving yourself permission to be the main character in your life is arguably one of the greatest gifts you can ever give yourself. It’s saying no to codependency, to people pleasing, to toning yourself down because you don’t want others to feel insecure. It’s living your life on your own terms and focusing on whatever makes you happy without caring about what anyone else has to say about it.
Stop With the Codependency
Easier said than done, right? As humans we want so badly to feel like we belong. It’s natural. It’s hardwired into our brains. We want to feel wanted, accepted. We want to be in a place where everyone knows our name and genuinely cares about us and our lives.
But sometimes we want that feeling of acceptance and belonging so bad that we sort-of bend over backwards and maybe even put ourselves last just so we can feel like we’re part of the group you know. We say yes when we’re afraid to say no. We inconvenience ourselves to make someone else’s day easier.
And that’s not okay. Part of being the main character in your life is putting yourself first. Main characters do things for others too, don’t get me wrong. But not at their own expense.
Focus on Yourself
It’s impossible to make everyone happy. No matter how hard you try, there’s always going to be someone that thinks it’s either “too much” or “not enough”. So if it’s impossible for everyone to be satisfied and happy with things, why are we even trying? Why not just do whatever we’re dreaming about and go on with our day?
Here’s my 2 cents. If a certain outfit makes you feel cute, wear it. If people think it's too much, who cares. They’ll forget all about it 30 minutes later. If you want to try a pilates class, or learn how to decorate cookies or maybe even start a YouTube channel, what are you waiting for? Focus on what would make you happy. At the end of the day, it’s just you. Everyone else is going to be so wrapped up in their own lives that they won’t even remember what you’re doing.
We don’t need anyone’s permission or approval. We just need to focus on ourselves and what would make you feel in control of your life.
Make a Habit of Feeling Good
You have to be intentional with your time. Whatever it is you’re dreaming of: writing a book, recording a podcast, earning a degree, building a wildly popular blog. It all comes so much easier when you make a point to feel good.
It doesn’t have to be complicated. Main characters take care of themselves, right? Go for a morning walk. Get your nails done. Treat yourself to Starbucks. Sign up for that yoga class. In order to be the main character in your life, you need to feel like the main character. Once you feel like the main character, everything else just falls into place. Suddenly you start gaining the confidence to make some moves and start living that dream life you’ve already built in your head.
Being the main character is about ditching the need to be liked or approved. It’s about living for yourself and forgetting what everyone else’s opinions are. Because at the end of the day, it’s nobody else but you. You are the one who has to live your life. So why not make it exactly the way you want it?